Dear Hollywood,
I just watched the trailer for "Race to Witch Mountain" on io9.com.
In case you require a reminder, this is a remake of "Escape to Witch Mountain". You may not know it, but "Escape to Witch Mountain" is a fond childhood memory of mine.
Thank you so much for despoiling more of my childhood memories.
That said, I would like to make something perfectly clear: I will not be spending my hard-earned money on any remakes spat up by the festering cesspool of inane vomit you appear to offer for the forseeable future.
As you're aware, the economy is not looking so rosy right now. Times are tight. Folks are looking to save. Odds are, someone like me is your best bet for making any money at all. I don't have kids. I don't have to worry about covering anyone else's expenses save my own.
In short, I'm probably an ideal target audience.
And you ain't getting a penny from me until you STOP WITH THE CRAPPY REMAKES!!!
C'mon, guys. A remake of "The Day the Earth Stood Still" with KEANU REEVES? Who thought that was a good idea? Really? Seriously?
In a world where we've got stuff like "Dr. Horrible" being done on a shoestring budget on the Internet, why are you sinking so much money into crap?
Why?
Oh, screw you guys. You get nothing from me until you clean up your act.
Sincerely,
Me
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