Friday, December 30, 2011

Countdowns

Yeah, yeah. It's almost 2012.

I'm personally thrilled to see 2011 go. It was a shitty, shitty year.

Oh, some good stuff happened. A couple of kids were born to friends of mine. Other miscellaneous stuff.

Overall, it was otherwise shit and I'm glad to see this goddamn year end.

Happy F***ing New Year.

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Ninja Skillz - Rope vs Sword



I'm sure some pervert out there is thinking this is hentai. Sickos.

This is pretty awesome. Appropriately-enough, seen on the Awesomer blog.

Monday, December 19, 2011

Wow



Watch to the end. It's like these guys understand....

Ding Dong, the Witch is Dead

Well, Kim Il Jong is dead, anyway.

I guess that can go into the "good" column for 2011.

Will be interesting to see what happens next in North Korea. Will Kim Il Jong's son be just as batshit crazy?

Will Kim Il Jong rise from the dead and start snacking on the brains of the living?

Will the zombie meme ever die?

I need more coffee...

[Edit] So I guess I have his name wrong. It's Kim Jong Il? How embarrassing. [/Edit]

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Balls of the Week


... WHAT???

"It Can't Happen Here"

Some years back, my father gave me a book to read: "It Can't Happen Here by Sinclair Lewis.

It was topical enough. The crimes of 9-11 were fresh in everyone's mind and mob mentality was sweeping the nation. Peopl wanted blood for the crimes committed by a small group of homicidal lunatics and they didn't care what price had to be paid.

The book was a pretty scary read. It was published in 1935 and satirized Hitler's rise to power by writing how a similar fascist movement rises to power in a mythical America.

Not quite seventy years later, the myth seemed to be getting closer to reality.

It's now 2011. We've had "Change" thanks to a compelling political campaign put on by Barak Obama back in 2004. I have to admit, I didn't think we - as a country - could do worse than Bush and Cheney. I still think Obama is better than those two douchebags, but the Dumbocrats are proving that the difference between them and the Repugnicans is barely-measurable.

If you haven't heard of the Indefinite Detention bill, you haven't been paying attention. Can't really blame you, given the Holidaze madness and all that.

No wait, I really can. We should all be paying attention to the actions of those in power, especially in this era of Occupy politics.

Anyway, the bill reinforcing the government's power to toss the 14th Amendment (that whole bit about due process) and indefinitely-detain anyone labelled a "terrorist" without hearing or trial just passed the House and is going to get signed into law by the President.

To say this is utter and complete bullshit doesn't quite cover it.

This country has stumbled in our history when it comes to civil rights. The internment camps for Japanese Americans during World War II was - simply put - an abomination. The "red-baiting" powers grabbed by Congress under Truman in the 1950's were disgusting.

This sort of legislation is as un-American as one can get. It's more than a mere mockery of our Constitution. It's a systematic torture and murder of the civil rights granted in our nation and a rape of the foundations of our culture.

We need to toss both the Repugnicans and Dumbocrats out of office and power altogether. They've proven time and time again that they're just tools for making this country into the sort of fascist powers our parents' and grandparents' generations fought against in the 20th century.

This shit is just sick.

It may be Quixotic, but I'm going to focus my personal efforts into contributing more to the causes I know will put up a fight against this utter and complete nonsense:

* The ACLU
* Amnesty International
* The Electronic Frontier Foundation

We can do better than the status-quo of greed and fear-driven leadership. We have to.

Argh. I hate being serious.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Tipping Point

Just about halfway through December. Xmas is nearly upon us. 2011 is almost over.

Can't wait for that last bit.

Now I just get to hope that all the remaining Xmas orders arrive before Xmas. Actually, I'd prefer they arrived before my office closes, as I had 'em shipped there.

Whee.

After that, it's a matter of laying low, watching people transform into crazed lunatics, and drink enough that I don't notice if I'm one of them.

I've noticed people get really, really weird in December. I can't tell if it's some sort of Holidaze loneliness thing or if it's an avoidance tactic for holiday stresses or something else. Seems to manifest in an awful lot of people, though.

I cannot wait for this year to end. I know I've said it a lot, but I pretty much loathe 2011. The only thing that could have made it worse would have been if it were an election year.

You know, like 2012... oh shit.

Gah!

The Eight "Rather You Didn'ts"

The Flying Spaghetti Monster (FSM) is pretty flexible, as creators go. I attribute this to being largely a mass of cooked pasta noodles and meatballs. Even partially-cooked pasta is pretty flexible.

Anyways...

So there's not really commandments in the Pastafarian faith. There are some "Rather You Didn'ts" given to the pirate Captain Mosey on Mount Salsa. There were originally ten, but Mosey was apparently a bit of a butterfinger and dropped a couple.

So with that, I give you the Eight "Rather You Didn'ts":

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1. I'd really rather you didn't act like a sanctimonious holier-than-thou ass when describing my noodly goodness. If some people don't believe in me, that's okay. Really, I'm not that vain. Besides, this isn't about them so don't change the subject.

2. I'd really rather you didn't use my existence as a means to oppress, subjugate, punish, eviscerate, and/or, you know, be mean to others. I don't require sacrifices, and purity is for drinking water, not people.

3. I'd really rather you didn't judge people for the way they look, or how they dress, or the way they talk, or, well, just play nice, okay? Oh, and get this into your thick heads: woman = person. man = person. Samey = Samey. One is not better than the other, unless we're talking about fashion and I'm sorry, but I gave that to women and some guys who know the difference between teal and fuchsia.

4. I'd really rather you didn't indulge in conduct that offends yourself, or your willing, consenting partner of legal age AND mental maturity. As for anyone who might object, I think the expression is "go fuck yourself," unless they find that offensive in which case they can turn off the TV for once and go for a walk for a change.

5. I'd really rather you didn't challenge the bigoted, misogynistic, hateful ideas of others on an empty stomach. Eat, then go after the bitches.

6. I'd really rather you didn't build multi million-dollar synagogues / churches / temples / mosques / shrines to my noodly goodness when the money could be better spent (take your pick):
I. Ending poverty
II. Curing diseases
III. Living in peace, loving with passion, and lowering the cost of cable
I might be a complex-carbohydrate omniscient being, but I enjoy the simple things in life. I ought to know. I AM the creator.

7. I'd really rather you didn't go around telling people I talk to you. You're not that interesting. Get over yourself. And I told you to love your fellow man, can't you take a hint?

8. I'd really rather you didn't do unto others as you would have them do unto you if you are into, um, stuff that uses a lot of leather/lubricant/vaseline. If the other person is into it, however (pursuant to #4), then have at it, take pictures, and for the love of Mike, wear a CONDOM! Honestly, it's a piece of rubber. If I didn't want it to feel good when you did it I would have added spikes, or something.
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So now you know some of the core tenants to the Pastafarian faith. Try not to get too excited.

Carbs of the Soul

I'll admit I've been thinking about it for a while.

I finally bit the linguini and became an ordained Pastafarian minister. The certificate arrived yesterday in a plain white cardboard envelope.

I was overwhelmed with joy and shared this with a number of friends whom I'm confident would not immediately attempt to burn me at the stake.

My original excuse was that I thought it would be funny to be able to officiate marriages. A little research revealed that it's pretty easy to do that in my county-of-residence and California as a whole, so it wasn't really necessary.

It added a certain gravitas (gravy-tas?) to the idea, though.

I celebrated the occasion by hitting Pasta Pomodoro for lunch then purchasing a frame for my certificate. It now proudly adorns a wall in my apartment next to an old photo of dogs playing poker.

Yeah. I live life with class, style, and panache.

That's one goal for 2011 down. About a week and a half left in the year to look at the rest of the list...

Monday, December 12, 2011

Oh Happy Day!

I never thought Mondays would ever be good.

And then Danger 5 came into my life.

New episode up. Oh the joy!

Friday, December 9, 2011

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Jon Stewart sings it

Jon Stewart covers the utter and complete bullshit that is the National Defense Authorization act.

You know, the little bit of Senate-approved legislation that pretty much rapes the Fourth Amendment and then beats it to death with a shovel and dumps it in a ditch.

That legislation.

Anyways, clips:


Tuesday, December 6, 2011

2011

In about 26 days, the year 2011 will end.

I won't be sorry to see it go.

Every year has its good and its bad. In my personal ledger, 2011 has had an extraordinary amount of entries in the "bad" column.

The latest is discovering my bank account may be compromised by some skimmers. I don't see any activity that's inappropriate on my account, but I'm in one of those lovely risk zones.

So I have to weigh whether or not I should close my account and open a new one right around the holidaze.

I really didn't need this little bit of drama right now.

Could be worse, I suppose.

Still, I'm ready for 2011 and all its baggage to go fuck off somewhere.

Monday, December 5, 2011

A happy Monday?

Danger 5 released a new episode today (yesterday? Whenever).

If you ever watched the cheesy '60's spy shows ("The Man from U.N.C.L.E.", "The Avengers", or even "The Prisoner"), you need to be watching "Danger 5".

If you don't get it, well... that makes me sad for you.

Friday, December 2, 2011

Brothers. The Big Ones.

While reading BoingBoing, I found this amidst their usual selection of fascinating offerings: Spy Files.

It's a WikiLeaks associated project showing surveillance by nation.

Creepy stuff.

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Realization

It's freakin' DECEMBER.

How the hell did this month sneak up on me like that?

December isn't exactly a ninja month. Bloody hell.

2012 is just around the corner. While watching time fly isn't necessarily something I want, I've pretty much loathed the majority of 2011, so I won't be sorry to see this fucking year go.

Just have to somehow survive Xmas...

And I need to get ordained in the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Urgh. My "to do" list is pretty long...

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

More Danger 5

So there's only been two episodes of Danger 5 released thus far, not including the spectacular trailer.

I guess I don't feel quite so bad about not knowing it existed until recently.

The flipside is that I now have to wait for more episodes.

I WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANTSSSSS MORE!!!

Monday, November 28, 2011

Danger Will Robinson!

I don't know why it's taken me so long to discover Danger 5.

I caught a snippet on YouTube and am hooked. I plan to watch the rest of everything this week.

Entertainment needs more of this. Now. Right. Now.

Sunday, November 27, 2011

The Holidaze Begin

Ah, Thanksgiving (aka "Turkey Day"). A time of sanctioned gluttony.

Oh, and there's some "giving thanks" thoughts in the stew somewhere. Or is it in the mashed potatoes.

Mmm... mashed potatoes...

I'm personally giving thanks to the fact that I can now move my arm with a minimum of pain. The ligament damage is healing nicely. I can't use my arm for any heavy lifting, but such is the nature of soft-tissue injuries.

And now the countdown begins to Xmas. Ye gods.

I got some Xmas shopping done yesterday. It's going to be a light holiday. Money is tighter than usual. *sigh*

SyFy channel pleasantly surprised me by airing re-runs of the new show "Grimm". I recorded the four eps and watched 'em back-to-back.

Not bad. The story is intriguing. The main characters are kind of bland, but it's better than I expected. Too bad it airs opposite "Fringe". Though given how this season of "Fringe" is going, I can't say either show is better than the other.

I think I'm mentally-ready for the holidaze madness. Helps to have a local brewery.

Mmm... beer.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Bill O'Reilly is a jackass

Reference: http://www.salon.com/2011/11/22/oreilly_no_right_to_second_guess_the_police/

Specifically (lifted from this article):

I don’t think we have the right to Monday-morning quarterback the police. Particularly at a place like U.C. Davis, which is, you know, a fairly liberal campus, and they’re not running around. They camp to the point where … the Chancellor said “Look, you gotta get them out of there. We can’t operate a college like this.”

"Particularly at a place like U.C. Davis"? Dude, have you ever BEEN to U.C. Davis? It's not exactly a hotbed of revolution and those kids were just SITTING there. So because it's a "liberal campus" it's okay for cops to dose kids who are just SITTING there with military-grade pepper spray at point-blank range?

Seriously?

I'd like someone to demonstrate to O'Reilly what that feels like. Maybe they can wash the pepper spray off with some nice waterboarding.

What an asshole.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

It's not Democracy, it's DiGiorno


I'm in favor of voting everyone out of Congress and starting fresh at this point.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

An Open Letter to Apple

Dear Apple,

Thank you so much for the iOS 5.0.1 update that has utterly obliterated the battery life on my iTouch. The device was working perfectly and without any issues (rare for the electronics in my life) until yesterday's update.

And your update has fucked that utterly. Thanks so very much.

May pestilence infest every aspect of your lives and fire burn the rest, you miserable, ratfuck bastards.

Why, no. I'm not bitter. Why do you ask?

Assholes.

Sincerely,

Me.

Thursday, November 10, 2011

The Thick of It

I was recently loaned "The Thick of It", a particularly foul-mouthed British comedy about the inner-workings of government.

I love it.

I absolutely love it.

It's a profanity-laced extravaganza of government-dysfunction and horrible human beings. I'm now on the third season and can't stop watching the horror.

Good times.

At this point, I may finish today, as I've got to take time off to see the doctor over my mangled shoulder. Good for what ails ya...

Ah life

I find it funny how things go sometimes.

I've been wrestling with the idea of taking some time off from one of my hobbies. The one that hurts me. That one.

Then, last night, I took a bad fall. By "bad" I mean "I can't properly use a limb now and am going to see a physician today".

And just like that, life took care of that little decision.

In the meantime, I ponder if I have a soft-tissue injury or my first fracture that I'm aware of.

Excitement abounds.

Good timing for my "Dr. Who Series Six, Part Two" and Big Trouble in Little China DVDs to arrive.

Friday, November 4, 2011

Oh My God


After having seen this segment, anarchy's lookin' awful purdy...

Friday, October 28, 2011

Japanese Little Girl Death-ish Metal

At first I wasn't sure if I considered this an abomination or not.

I've since decided that this is just goddamn hysterical. Thank the gods for Japan and its endless font of weird.



(via The Daily What)

Sonic Screwdrivers and Action Movies



(via Topless Robot)

Genki Sudo



I first saw videos of these guys on the glorious WTF Japan, Seriously? website.

Then I saw another. Then another.

These guys are something else. The music is okay, but the choreography is unbelievable. It's just unreal. The level of muscle control these guys have boggles the mind.

And the expressions of people in the background of their videos is priceless.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Farcebook

I'm one step closer (or one step away, I guess) from deleting my Facebook account.

To be honest, I've been thinking about this for a while now. I resisted Facebook for a long time. I wound up establishing a Facebook account reluctantly and for stupid reasons. I kept it under tight rein for a long time, adding friends slowly and carefully, and taking advantage of as much of Facebook's inadequate privacy settings as I could.

I put up with Facebook's constant fucking around with their UI and their meddling with their settings. I put up with their crappy interface. I did all this mainly to converse with a few people with whom I can't otherwise interact normally.

I've been wondering if it's been worth the effort, really.

Today I just found out that another of Facebook's crappy privacy settings hiccuped and started exposing stuff I usually have on lockdown. I'm pretty good about not posting very private stuff. My account info is mostly a tissue of lies and I do my best to nuke any photos of myself.

That said, I get pissed when photo albums I have, regardless of how private they are, somehow slip past the net of security settings I have.

And they did.

I reset the settings. I have no idea if the setting is holding. I'm going to sleep on this. Odds are I'm going to nuke the account tomorrow. I may change my mind. We'll see.

Fucking Facebook.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Getting Belted

I own an 686 Tool Belt, despite never having snowboarded in my life.

Why?

I like having tools handy and like clever gadgets. I'll admit that I like the idea of wearing something like this when I fly. The screwdrivers that make up the belt are generally under the length that makes the TSA twitch and only a crazy person would ever think this could be a "weapon".

Then I read Cory Doctorow's experience wearing such a belt in a UK airport.

Jeez.

The UK is the only country I've ever flown through that's even more batshit crazy with their security measures than the TSA. I'm sure someone thought they were logical at one point, but they've just devolved into utter madness.

Last year I few out to Europe and had a brief stopover in Heathrow. My TSA-approved bottle of contact lens solution was too big for Heathrow's security people and they made me toss it. This was after they scanned everything with some sci-fi device to confirm the rest of my liquids were not dangerous.

Why? Blind adherence to a stupid rule. The container fit in the supplied plastic bag Heathrow's security wonks provided me. It was just arbitrarily "too big" for one of the security wonks to let me carry without harassment.

I guess they were afraid of me cleaning my contacts.

Could be worse. Their security didn't otherwise hassle me (I can be a fantastic liar and I faked sympathy and understanding to just get through the herd of crazy). Others I traveled with got patted-down, while I was physically-unmolested.

I even saw Heathrow's security wonks pat down a five-year-old.

A five-year-old. Dangerous looking five-year-old. Terrifying romper the little demon was wearing. Could've been worse, I suppose. He could have been armed with a teddy bear or some such.

I bet they would have confiscated it, too.

Monday, October 24, 2011

Stein of Science Hack

I love, love, love my Stein of Science.

Strictly-speaking, I should say STEINS (plural) of SCIENCE, as I own more than one.

That's how much I love them.

If I had anything that might, in the right light, at a distance, remotely be considered an issue, it might be how the upper-part of the grip for the stein can dig into my fingers, especially when the stein is full of liquid (such as beer).

With the weight of the ruggedized stein, it can leave a bit of a dent in my finger. This is hardly an Earth-shattering issue, but it's something I think about from time-to-time.

Then, one day, I discovered a possible modification: sugru.

Sugru is a kind of putty that hardens in a few hours in whatever shape you've molded it. I saw some on the crack purveyors of ThinkGeek and thought "hey, maybe I can modify my Stein(s)".

My sugru shipment came in Friday. I took my steins aside, applied some sugru, and now have a soft, colorful, moulding on the inside of my stein's grip.

I wish I had more artistic skill. I just glommed on some sugru on the inner grip, but in retrospect, I bet I could have done something fancy. *sigh*

Of course, now I have fewer excuses to put the blessed thing down...

[Edit] I've been told by a friend that my artistic skills are somewhat lacking. Specifically I was told that my application of sugru on my Stein of Science looks like used chewing gum applied to the handle.

Hm.

Friday, October 21, 2011

Lovecraftian Anime Music Video (NSFW)



Full disclosure: This is NOT SAFE FOR WORK!

That said, this is an amusing hybrid between really disturbing hentai and Lovecraftian brain-melting awesome.

In brief: this is deeply fucked up. You're welcome.

Quakin' in our booties

If you're anywhere near a media source of any kind and live anywhere near the San Francisco Bay Area, you probably heard we had a couple of mild quakes yesterday.

Per the USGS, there was a 4.0 around 2:40pm followed by a 3.8 about 8:16 pm or so.

It's my first, second, and third instincts to mock the hullabaloo over this. Anything under a 5.0 is pretty minor and yawn-worthy. I honestly thought the 4.0 was construction work taking place in my office building. I largely-ignored the 3.8.

In retrospect, I think I was entirely too blase about this. If either quake had been stronger, I wouldn't have taken precautions for any kind of cover and that might have sucked.

The quakes hit along the Hayward Fault. For non-Bay Area people, that fault is probably the worst fault for the Bay Area to have issues with. When that bad boy snaps on a 5+ level, things are not going to go well for this area. I've looked up the likely spots I'll be should a major (say a 7.0) quake hit on the Hayward Fault.

Odds look pretty grim that any area I'll be in will be even remotely safe.

*sigh*

I've got all the requisite disaster kits. The joy of being a paranoid is that the Voices prompt you to be ready for earthquakes as well as comets, Men in Black, cyborgs from the future, and all that.

My plan for the cyborgs from the future is to trip the nearest person to me and run like hell. Just so you know.

But back to the quakes... yeah, they were a bit startling, but I can't help feeling a bit amused by all the attention paid them. A 4.0 is a bit startling, but it's not like anything was... oh wait. I haven't checked my desk.

OH MY GOD! MY UNDEAD NINJA FIGURE FELL OVER! IT MUST HAVE BEEN THE QUAKE!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!!!!!!!

Yeah, I'm done. Happy Friday.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Wallet Time

I just acquired CountyComm's Traveler RFID Wallet.

I'm very pleased with this purchase.

In a nutshell, the wallet uses mylar lining to block RFID signals. This pleases my paranoid side. It's also made of ripstop nylon, so it's supposed to be hard to tear or damage.

Time will tell if that's the truth.

What really sold me on it was the number of pockets and the durable zipper to seal the whole thing. I sometimes have a lot of random cards and crap in my wallet. It's nice to be able to seal the damn thing up.

Too bad I don't have room for cash. Heh.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Spewing of Data: 10-18-2011

So those three hikers who got jailed by Iran? They're getting a headline for supporting Occupy Wall Street.

It's nice they're keeping busy and all. I'm all for supporting the OWS folks, but these hikers don't - in my opinion - need any more media coverage.

---

I'm on an Irish/Gaelic/Celtic music kick again. Bwah. I've just listened to Gaelic Storm and Wicked Tinkers music since I woke up this morning. I'm slightly-addicted to "Nil S'en La" (a track from yet another album I can't recall the title of). I'm a sucker for a group of lady singers doing the Irish music.

---

Yet another year and I can't think of a Halloween costume.

No that's not true. I'm not inspired to put in any effort to come up with a Halloween costume.

---



'Nuff said.

(xkcd)

---

Jumping back on to the topic of the OWS protestors, the EFF has advice what to do with your phone in protests.

Good times.

Friday, October 14, 2011

Cool Bike Bag

Saw this Bike "Blacksmith tool case" on The Gadgeteer.

I find myself drooling slightly at the thought of having this to adorn my worn, but much-loved, bicycle. That said, I'm not sure I'd actually get it. I'm already twitchy about leaving my bike locked up in random places. I'd be constantly-freaking out over the thought that some asshole would steal this glorious-looking piece of leather awesome.

*sigh*

Salon, the CIA, and 9-11

In case you thought all the news over the famous intelligence failure that led to the 9-11 attacks was over...

Salon has a good article on the FBI vs CIA in-fighting that led to law enforcement dropping the ball and the 9-11 attacks taking place.

If this article is any guide, sounds like George Tenent really fucked up.

Of course, Tenent gave us the whole "weapons of mass destruction" bullshit that justified the invasion of Iraq, so there's that.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

The Wedding of River Song - redux

So my last post was more spoiler-y recap and less personal reactions.

I needed to sleep on this and digest my thoughts.

Spoilers...

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Likes:
* The Doctor's overall reactions. Playing everyone nicely. Never showing excessive sentiment towards River (despite the marriage). The great bluff.
* Amy as a secret agent.
* Rory. He just exudes badass.
* Dorium as a head.
* Live chess.
* Faking the Doctor's death.
* Amy Pond realizing she's a mother-in-law. Expression: priceless.
* Amy and River having wine and comparing notes. It was a cute moment.
* Amy's final words to Madam eyepatch.

On-The-Fence:
* Using the Tesselecta to impersonate the Doctor. It was a clever cheat, but a bit forced and contrived.
* The big time mash-up. It was fun, but too implausible and weird.
* The big question. Really?

Dislikes:
* The "SOS" to the Universe. Okay, that's been done to death. And it was a ridiculous, pointless, stupid plot element.
* The "wedding" of the Doctor and River. There didn't appear to be any point for that. It was so utterly random that it was like having a safety-pin jabbed into your side.
* The undefined scale of power of the Silence. If they can affect any living thing, including Time Lords, why didn't they take over Gallifrey?
* The excessive, mawkish sentimental bullshit.

Overall, I liked the episode. It was satisfying provided I stop picking at the plot holes. Unfortunately, my OCD prevents me from leaving it alone, so it will continue to bug me.

Still, it was far better than I expected, given the lackluster performance of the episodes that followed "A Good Man Goes to War".

Saturday, October 1, 2011

A Grand Wedding Song

And just like that, I've seen "The Wedding of River Song".

Twice.

Spoilers.

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The Doctor is going to his melodramatic appointment with death that's been the theme of this season.

There's something a bit amiss, though. Time is mashed together with Winston Churchill as the Holy Roman Emperor in a world of skyscrapers, steam engines, and balloon-suspended cars while pterodactyls torment parks and the Pyramids have been inducted into the military's service.

The Doctor (known as Churchill's "soothsayer") is dragged by Roman Centurions to explain to Churchill why it's always 5:02 pm on a specific date.

And the Doctor begins his recap...

The Doctor, after the last episode, tracks down information on the Silence by picking the ruins of a Dalek (it's implied the Doctor took out said Dalek, but never stated). The Doctor crosses path with the Tesselecta, the humanoid, shapeshifting, time-travel vehicle crewed by miniaturized people. They, too, are investigating the Silence.

The Doctor's path takes him to a space viking who leads him to a gruesome storage area where the head of Dorium Maldovar (decapitated by the Headless Monks in "A Good Man Goes to War") is stored.

Dorium explains that the Silence want to kill the Doctor so he can't go to some place and be forced to answer the "first question". Answering that question means the Silence must fall.

Flip back to the present. It turns out the Silence are back and trying to kill the Doctor and Churchill. The Doctor realizes this as marks start to appear on his arm... a running tally of the Silence he's seeing and then forgetting.

The Doctor then reveals that he went to his appointment with death after talking to Maldovar. He sends out his invitations and walks right up to the space-suited River Song. He tells River he forgives her and waits for her to shoot him. She doesn't. Time starts to disintegrate...

Flip back to the present again. The Doctor and Churchill are surrounded by Silence. The pair are rescued by mysterious soldiers led by a familiar redhead with an eyepatch: Amelia Pond.

Amy is now some kind of spook who remembers the two timelines. With Rory as her faithful captain, she is working with River Song to use technology stolen from the captive Madam Kovarian so they can see, and capture, Silence.

A number of things unfold:

* If the Doctor and River touch, time restarts and goes back to the moment when River is being forced by the weird spacesuit to kill the Doctor. The Doctor wants this. River can't live with it.

* The eyepatches worn by Amy's people, are copies of those worn by the agents of the Silence. They let someone see a Silent and remember doing so. They are, unfortunately, also booby-trapped...

* The Silence are not prisoners... they were waiting to kill the Doctor.

Long-story short:

* Amy leaves Madam Kevorian to die from the treachery of the Silence, essentially killing Kevorian.

* River and Amy have cobbled together some kind of nonsensical time-transmitter-thing to ask the Universe to help the Doctor. Don't ask. It doesn't even try to make sense.

* The Doctor marries River. Why? Not really clear, but roll with it. The Doctor appears to tell River his "real name".

* The Doctor and River kiss. Time restarts with the Doctor slain.

The scene shifts to Amy getting slowly drunk. The Doctor is gone and she is devastated. River appears, having just finished the adventure with the Weeping Angels at the Byzantium. Amy bemoans wanting to talk to the Doctor...

And River reveals to Amy (and, a few moments later, Rory) that the Doctor, while present for his "death", was not slain. The Doctor who was shot and "killed" was the Tesselecta with the Doctor on-board.

The Doctor has faked his death and decided to start operating from the shadows. He returns Maldovar's head to its place in the tombs and the two talk. Maldovar then shouts to the departing Doctor the question that must never be answered:



Again. Spoilers.

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Doctor who?

Friday, September 30, 2011

Monday, September 26, 2011

Fringe 4.1

"Neither Here nor There"

That was the fourth season opener for "Fringe" on Friday night. Why am I posting this Monday?

In a word: beer.

Never mind that. Let's get to the episode.

So... if you haven't finished Season Three, there's spoilers.


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Warning taken care of. Moving on.

At the end of Season Three, Peter Bishop (aka The Character The Writers Don't Have A Clue What To Do With) merged a portion of the two warring universes then was apparently erased from history.

Just roll with it.

Season Four begins with "our" Universe's version of Lincoln Lee, the awesome leader of the "Over There" team getting enmeshed in a Fringe-style investigation that results in the death of his partner.

Olivia is back to her Terminator-esque personality. Walter is reanimating birds with milk. Broyles is still Broyles. Astrid is a bit more frantic, but still Astrid.

There's weirdness. There's gruesome deaths. There's Observers. There's flickers of Peter, who I guess has not been completely erased from existence. The Observers seem keen to correct that and completely erase him, but then our favorite Observer (I think his "name" is September?) has second thoughts.

Oh, and there's a new batch of villainous, homicidal shapeshifters who appear to have an agenda that may be unrelated to either "our" universe or "Over There".

Overall, it was a nice intro. Adding Lincoln Lee to the main cast gives another much-needed sympathetic character, especially given that Astrid will never get the spotlight at this point. He's a welcome change from the bland and undefined Peter Bishop and the emotionless Olivia Dunham.

I have high hopes for this season.

Foolish me.

Saturday, September 24, 2011

Closing Time

Yeah... I'm not even going to bother with an intro.

Spoilers.

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"Stormageddon, Dark Lord of All."

Love it.

Yeah... so "Closing Time".

Cybermats! Cybermen!

Craig! Stormageddon, Dark Lord of All!

Craziness in a shop!

There was baby stuff. Comedy. Sonic Screwdriver shooting sonic bolts of green.

"Don't worry, I have an app for that."

"Come on, Bitey."

It was a clever little one-shot. Very good stuff.

Have a problem with Cybermen being "centuries old". Continuity... is it really that hard?

The episode was heavy-handed, ridiculous, fluffy sentimental bullshit.

For all that, it was entertaining, but it might have been all the beer I've had to drink this evening.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

And so it begins...

Seven blissful days of slacking.

I start it with a tweaked neck from a bad fall (literally landing on my head).

More reason to drink.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Complex Gods

Saw "The God Complex" yesterday.

Spoilers follow.

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The prologue has a policewoman walking through a maze that looks like an 80's style hotel. In each room she enters, there's something creepy.

Like clowns.

She's keeping a running diary and finally has some kind of mental breakdown. With a blissful look on her face she's snagged by something that sounds bestial and hungry.

Enter the Doctor, Amy, and Rory. They landed randomly and start exploring. While there, they encounter four people: a medic of some sort, a paranoiac blogger, a cowardly alien, and a crazy dude tied to a chair.

The crazy dude is in a room of ventriloquist dummies. Oh but that's creepy. Crazy dude says that he's ready to be snacked up by the thing behind it all and advises everyone that there's a "room for each of them".

Cue the creepy encounters. Crazy guy gets snacked on by the creature. It doesn't physically harm him. It just takes out his life somehow.

One-by-one the blogger and the medic also fall to the creature. The alien dude, a member of "the most conquered race in the universe" manages to stay alive. Rory seems unaffected while Amy winds up in the creature's sights.

The creature is essentially a minotaur (old-timers of the show will catch the reference to the Nimon of the old Tom Baker era episode "The Horns of Nimon"). It snacks on the faith of those who wind up in its prison/lair.

The episode devolves a bit into clumsy storytelling. The Doctor seems unaffected by the creature's lure. Rory isn't affected for reasons very unclear to me, but in order to save Amy, the Doctor gives some kind of bullshit-ish story to make Amy lose faith in him.

'Cause the creature wanted to eat Amy's faith.

The defeat of the creature was weird and a bit nonsensical.

The alien guy from the most-conquered world survived and remained intensely-annoying.

The episode ended with the Doctor parting ways with Amy and Rory (after giving Rory a nice, red sports car). The parting was awkward and weird. It wasn't terribly well-done in my opinion.

In a nutshell, "The God Complex" was pretty typical fare for the Smith era offerings. It had a great setup but crapped out on delivery. As a horror-ish episode, it's weak tea next to the Tom Baker era horror fare or even the McCoy era stuff.

Two more episodes left before the end of series six.

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Sing it!


It really does call out what a bunch of assholes came out of the woodwork a mere two days after the terrorist attack.

9/11 Merlot? Seriously?

Alpha bits

I've been watching SyFy's "Alphas".

There. I said it.

It's sad that I feel embarrassed by watching anything on SyFy these days. All the same, I felt intrigued by the concept and have been watching it continually since the show started.

There's a few spoilers contained below. If this show even remotely interests you, you should be aware of that.

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Okay, moving on.

The show is a tepid, weak-tea attempt at doing "Heroes" and "X-Men". I think I posted on this a few months back. It's not a great show by any means, but it has promise.

Monday night it realized some of that promise.

The premise is pretty straightforward: there's people in the world who have special abilities. These abilities are often offset with some kind of psychological or physiological issue.

Example:

Bill Harken (Malik Yoba): an ex-FBI agent who can jack up his adrenal glands to give himself super-strength and an inability to feel pain. As a result, he's got rage issues and is a bit of an aggressive dickhead. If he uses his super-strength too often, he gets all woozy and light-headed.

Gary Bell (Ryan Cartwright): A mildly-autistic guy who can "see" radio/cellular signals (except Nokia phone signals... gotta love that). He's easily the most interesting character of the lot.

Rachel Pirzad (Azita Ghanizada): A former FBI forensics student (maybe former agent? I'm unclear on this) who can jack up any of her senses at the expense of the others. So she can smell what you had for breakfast this morning or when you bathed last, but she couldn't hear you talking right next to her. Or she could see the details of carpet impressions at the cost of similar senses. She's actually starting to grow on me.

Nina Theroux (Laura Mennell): A woman who can make you do whatever she says provided you can see and hear her. *Yawn* Boring character.

Cameron Hicks (Warren Christie): A former Army sniper with perfect coordination and a number of substance abuse issues. *Yawn* Boring character. Oh, and he has a very uninteresting fling-thing going on with Nina.

As super-powers go, the good guys don't have much in the way of flashy abilities. They're a mix of dysfunctional, issue-driven nuts who work for the Department of Defense in a vaguely brownshirt capacity as enforcers.

Am I the only person disturbed by the trend of TV shows in which the "heroes" completely ignore the Bill of Rights?

Anyway, this team is led by Doctor Lee Rosen (David Strathairn), a hippy-dippy, and vaguely sinister, psychologist who has no superpowers but understands them pretty well. Actually, Rosen may well be the most interesting character in the lot.

They fight "monsters of the week" in the form of people with superpowers.

Last week they started to move out of the bush leagues. The guest stars were Brent Spiner ("Data" of "Star Trek: The Next Generation") and Rebecca Mader (one of the many walk-on roles in "Lost"). Spiner played a blind guy with the bat-like ability of echolocation. He can apparently amp up his sonar powers over time and eventually bring down buildings. Pretty badass, really.

Mader played a mercenary who can hide in the "blind spot" of the eye through some pseudo-scientific method. It was kind of cool, really.

What started as a clear contest between the so-called "heroes" and Spiner's character (a representative of the so-called villain group "Red Flag", a group who feel a need to sound like an insecticide) turned into a three-way throwdown as Mader's character "Griffin" (loved the Invisible Man reference) entered the fray and expanded the mythology a bit.

It's sad that the walk-on characters are generally more interesting than the main cast.

The show does have promise. There's a vague sense of moral ambiguity as some of the characters (specifically the otherwise-uninteresting Hicks and Nina) have doubts about working for the DOD to take down people with similar abilities and talents.

The show would benefit immensely by ditching Hicks as a character. His backstory is tired and cumbersome. His relationship with Nina feels contrived. The character's abilities are cool, but sadly-underused.

Similarly, the writers should either make Nina less of a vamp-like character or ditch the character altogether.

Certainly both characters could benefit from having their backstories spiced up a bit. Maybe make Hicks a "Red Flag" mole or something.

And "Red Flag"? Really? That's the name of the bad guys? Seriously?

Ye gods.

It would also be nice if the show could figure out if they're going the route of "Heroes" and introducing superpowers where people can read minds, throw lightning and all that or staying low-key (and thus low-budget).

Monday, September 12, 2011

Those Weekend Moments

It's exhausting to try to avoid all the 9/11 insanity.

Seriously.

Don't get me wrong. I thought (and still think) 9/11 was a terrible, terrible crime of epic proportions against the United States. That said, I watched all the crazy, over-the-top coverage back in 2001. I don't feel a burning need to see all that shit again and get drenched in the over-the-top faux-sentimental bullshit that most media outlets serve up in lieu of actual news.

So I tried to keep the television off all weekend long.

I spent a few hours in a local pub, enjoying local beer and tasty, tasty food. I really ought to cut back on that. The food is very, very tasty and the beer is very, very tasty and strong. Neither is going to help me lose weight.

Bah.

It was hard to otherwise stay motivated to do anything at all. None of my books are keeping my attention for very long.

The latest "Doctor Who" served as a lovely distraction for a bit, but the second half of this season isn't exactly knocking my socks off.

Simultaneously, I'm trying to wean myself off of social networking (both Facebook and G+) so that's two less distractions.

I hit a local street-faire but that bored me pretty quickly, though I did get a couple of swanky new hats. Unfortunately, said head-gear makes me look like a goddamn hipster so I feel a burning need to shove my head into a garbage disposal and turn it on when I wear said swanky new hats.

For all that, it was surprising how fast the weekend blazed by.

I suspect the beer had something to do with it.

Saturday, September 10, 2011

A Drop of a Pond

Just saw "The Girl Who Waited", the Amy-centric episode of "Doctor Who".

Spoilers below. You know how this works.

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And... you were warned.

It's a non-story arc episode. The Doctor, Amy, and Rory land on a world. They get separated and find out there's something on the planet that's lethal to the Doctor. To make matters all the more fun, Amy is separated by both a different time stream and being in a physically-different place.

Good times.

I won't do a full recap. It pays to see the episode in its entirety. It's very much Amy-centric and Karen Gilan gets an opportunity to shine as she plays herself across some wonky time-travel craziness.

You do get a bit of a sense of what an utter badass and genius Amy is capable of being. It's a little far-fetched, but it's "Doctor Who", so one must make allowances. They certainly explain a little of how River Song is such an unbelievable Mary Sue. I mean, if her mom is this freakin' preternaturally-capable and her dad is a badass in his own right, it stands to reason that River would inherit genes of the purest unstoppable.

One hopes they live long enough to have more children so they can go about conquering the Universe.

The episode sort of screws Amy over in multiple ways. It does a fine job really putting the polish on the whole Amy-Rory dynamic and how their relationship really works. Arthur Darvill had several fine moments as Rory. I have to hand it to Darvill, he's quickly made Rory my favorite male Companion.

I'm fast becoming tired of the threats-that-are-so-bad-that-the-Doctor-can't-regenerate meme that Moffatt-era "Doctor Who" writers feel a need to bandy about. Seriously. It's like every other stop the Doctor is having is a specific, fine-tuned threat to his existence based on his Time Lord physiology. I mean, c'mon... first River Song has access to a poison that works against Time Lords and then in this episode, there's an illness that Time Lords are vulnerable to but humans aren't?

Good lord.

The Doctor is quite a bit of a dick in this episode as well. I get where he's coming from, but another tired meme is "the Doctor lies". That fast becomes tired when he lies in every damn episode.

I enjoyed "The Girl Who Waited" far, FAR more than "Let's Kill Hitler" and "Night Terrors". For all that, I have a hard time understanding why Amy and Rory choose to continue to associate, much less travel with, the Doctor. With all things considered, it's astounding they haven't just packed up and left.

Maybe that will be the season finale. Who knows?

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Night Terrors

Standard spoiler disclaimer.

Do not read further if you have not yet seen the "Doctor Who" episode entitled "Night Terrors".

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You were warned.

Per IMDB: "George, a young boy writes a "Help" note after fearing monsters in the closet and having multiple fears. The Doctor hears the cry and the team goes to visit."

That's a pretty accurate description of the premise. The Doctor, Amy, and Rory are in the TARDIS and the Doctor suddenly gets a psychic call for help from poor little George, a strange kid who is terrified of everything.

He's especially terrified of his cupboard.

There's a reason, of course.

So the episode starts off with promise. There's weird things afoot. People start to disappear. Creepy stuff happens.

Then there's the monsters. They push the buttons of creepy oh-so-nicely. The setting has a claustrophobic feel that compliments the introduction of the monsters delightfully.

It's not a bad episode until about halfway through. Suddenly the Doctor figures out what's going on and the episode just falls apart.

The final payoff for the episode is just anticlimactic and pretty much the standard fare of the majority of the Smith/Moffatt era episodes of "Dr. Who". The monster just isn't really a monster and the sinister threat is somehow diminished as a result.

It's cute as kid's fare, but ultimately disappointing given the more visceral menace promised by the Silence in the season opener or by the original Weeping Angels in "Blink".

For all that, I still enjoyed this episode more than "Let's Kill Hitler".

Ponderances

A friend of mine asked me for a list of science fiction programs I enjoy.

It was harder than I expected to put such together. What I came up with (in no particular order):

* Doctor Who (duh!)
* Blake's Seven
* Babylon-5
* Farscape
* The Invisible Man (the 2000 tv series back when it was the SciFi channel and they aired shows that didn't suck beyond words)
* Red Dwarf
* Fringe

I'm actually at a loss after this. I enjoyed the classic "Star Trek", but it's not something I regularly return to. The subsequent "Star Trek" series have not stood the test of time, in my opinion. They have no place on my list of greats.

I personally can't recommend the "Stargate" series in all its flavors. It just never grabbed me.

I'd recommend the re-imagined "Battlestar Galactica" up to about midway through season three. Then I'd recommend hunting down the writers and producers and beating them.

Beyond that, I got nuthin'.

Friday, September 2, 2011

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Brainsplatterfest

I love reading the more bizarre spammy comments random people post.

I love deleting them even more. It makes me feel warm and fuzzy.

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Some mornings I really should listen to the little voice in the back of my head that drowns out the other, louder, voices and tells me to just stay in bed (after calling in sick to the office, of course).

I always regret it when I don't listen to that little voice.

Damnit.

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Shipping is just a weird process.

I've gotten packages (using comparable shipping methods) from the UK, Hong Kong, and the domestic U.S. It boggles my mind that I've got a domestic package that's taking more than two weeks to get here and I've already received packages from other countries.

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I can't believe it's September tomorrow.

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Gettin' the pimp suit on

The Internets, in their grand and vile intention to exploit my weak nature, pointed me to a fascinating site in the glorious United Kingdom: A Touch of Ginger

Fascinating site. At first I thought it was some redhead thing (I guess our British cousins refer to redheads as "gingers").

Then I saw what they actually sell.

Check this out! A stainless-steel, credit-card-shaped bottle opener!

A Fish and Chips tool! (I dislike fish and would never consider using utensils to eat fries, but the concept is clever)

And their Urban Kits are just a bunch of pure win. I mean look at these little babies! Bike Ride kits! Flightbag kits! Dirty Stop Out kits! What the hell is a "dirty stop out"?

Seriously. Is that some kind of British slang? It must be.

Whatever works.

The sheer variety of kits they offer is just evidence of epic genius.

Observations

Claim: There are few things I enjoy more than bicycling in the wind in the early hours of the morning.

No, wait. That's a lie. I hate bicycling in the wind. Hate it.

Claim: I love moving all my junk to a new desk then cleaning up my old one.

Again, that's really just a great big lie.

Claim: I love edits.

Mixed lie. I hate seeing things I've done wrong, but I do like that someone caught it.

Claim: The Internet is my friend.

Utter and complete lie. The amount of money I've spent... oh god... why go there?

Claim: I excel at time management.

I really don't. That's so beyond a lie that it may actually have caused a bajillion angels to moult.





Monday, August 29, 2011

Who now?

I've re-watched "Let's Kill Hitler" for a total of two viewings.

I'm having problems with this.

Spoilers:

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You were warned.

Okay, so first of all: Melody Pond regenerates in 1969. She somehow then jaunts forward in time to the 1990s where she grows up in tandem with her future parents: Amy and Rory. She even gets them together.

Yet River has cautioned in the past of the dangers of interacting with one's own timeline. So... um... paradox...

And the regeneration things. So she's essentially just a Time Lady now? Except that she's not. Y'know. 'Cause she gave it up. To save the Doctor.

How the hell does poison lipstick work, anyway? Wouldn't the poison affect the person wearing it as well?

And what the hell kind of poison suspends a Time Lord's regeneration powers? I mean, if the Time War wiped out Gallifrey and the Time Lords - a secretive people to begin with - how the HELL does everyone seem to know so much about their technology and abilities?

How did the mini-people have so much accurate data on the Doctor? I mean, I get that some folks might know the TARDIS is a Type 40 TT, but how does anyone know it was stolen? The Doctor is cagey at best on that story.

And since apparently the Silence and the mini-people can time travel, why does ANYONE care about the Doctor? I mean, if everyone and Bob can time travel, what makes the Doctor and the TARDIS so special?

Why bother cooking up a Time Lady child (in the form of Melody Pond) if you can already time travel? What would be the point?

And the Doctor's got a half-hour of agony to live. He changes into a tux? Wha? And suddenly he's got a sonic cane? Really, they're just placing more toys now?

River Song's become WAY too "Mary Sue" for my tastes. She was an okay plot device once or twice, but she long ago crossed into "bugging me" territory. It was a nice twist that she's Amy and Rory's kid, but she can learn to fly the TARDIS in a few seconds interaction with the machine? She can throw regeneration blasts?

The whole story around her is so goddamn muddled now that it's become just one giant, epic, jump over a shark. And it bugs me.

The Moff is starting to lose me. Saddens me to write those words.

Saturday, August 27, 2011

Is there a Doctor in the...?

Just saw "Let's Kill Hitler".

I'm processing this one.

It's not what I expected.

And I'm okay with that, really.

Beyond that, I'm disinclined to comment at the moment, as that may provide spoilers.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Living in a "First World" nation

California is considered as "First World" as they come. We've got lots of food, clean water, and all that fun stuff. We've got technology up the wazoo. Compared to most of the world, we're doing pretty damn well. Depending on who you ask, we stand at roughly 7 or 8 in the world economy with the rest of the U.S. set aside.

So I find myself surprised at how often my neighborhood loses power.

In the Bay Area, we've got Pacific Gas and Electric (PG&E) as the monopoly that provides power to most cities. Some cities (the island of Alameda, for example) have their own municipal utility district to handle their power needs. For the rest of us lucky schmucks, we get PG&E with its spectacular service record.

They're so awesome, Julia Roberts starred in a movie about them.

On average, my 'hood loses power four or five times a year.

A year.

Without fail.

The outage can go from a few blocks to two or three cities. We're in a population-dense area here around the Bay, so that's a lot of people affected.

You'd think with a record like that, a utility company responsible for providing utilities to one of the most populated parts of the United States would fix the goddamn problem.

I mean, it's got to be expensive to send out repair crews to fix the same goddamn problem four or five times a year.

Apparently not.

Quake and Quake 2

No, this has nothing to do with videogames.

Yes, I thought the title was clever. I'm also running on one cup of coffee right now, so cut me some slack.

By this point, most folks know about the east coast earthquake here in the states. It's a tad unusual for Virginia to get hit with a 'quake. A 5.8 (or 5.9, depending on the source). I'm going with 5.8 'cause that's what the USGS says and as a good Californian, I go to them for info.

As a Californian, it's easy to scoff at a 5.8. That's an appreciable shaker, but not really in the category of badass. Our buildings out here are (in theory) built to handle 5.8 quakes with only the barest mention.

I usually don't pay any more than the most fleeting attention to anything under a 5.0, as a general rule.

So when we got a little jolt of our own last night, I have to say I paid it only the most cursory attention.

I think I was sound asleep, actually. The window rattled. It woke me up. I recall thinking "huh. Quake." Then I rolled over and promptly fell back into a surreal dream involving laser-umbrellas, zip-lines to tree houses, and flying over the Golden Gate Bridge.

Don't ask. I suspect I shouldn't have had that spicy chicken sandwich for dinner.

I just find it funny that the 3.6 quake here has gotten all that much attention. I mean, it's neat that it happened the same day as the east coast quake, but it's a freakin' 3.6!

I have a buddy who farts stronger than that after a hearty meal (I'M LOOKIN' AT YOU, T!)

The east coasters aren't used to getting quakes, and honestly, why should they? They already have enough troubles. I mean they've got humid summers, hurricanes, freezing winters, Congress, and Florida. Hell, they even get tornadoes sometimes.

Adding earthquakes to that pile is just being cruel.

East coast peeps, I feel genuine sympathy that you guys had to experience a quake. It must have been scary and disorienting. I hope that was a one-time gig for you guys. It really sucks to feel the earth shaking when you're not used to it.

You can now go back to dealing with the rest of that list. And you have my sympathies for having Florida. Really.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

More on that space battleship

I need to sleep on a movie before blabbing about it.

So... Space Battleship Yamato...

This film was released in Japan in early 2010. The initial trailers were pretty awesome. Epic space battles and all that fun stuff.

The trailers did the movie justice.

The premise of the movie... (could be spoiler-ish if you've never seen the anime)

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It's the 22nd century. Earth has developed space travel within the solar system. That's when an alien race comes along and bombs the human race beyond the stone age with "meteor bombs".

The meteor bombs make the Earth's surface unable to sustain life thanks to radiation and all that fun stuff. Earth has gone from green/blue to very Martian-red.

Ecologists and biologists are, by this point, having aneurysms, but I digress.

Earth's remaining space fleet is getting its ass kicked by the much superior aliens. Then, in true deus ex machina fashion, a message/probe from a far-away alien world comes to Earth. It contains schematics for a faster-than-light propulsion method for spaceships, a superior energy system, and coordinates.

So the Earth survivors (who apparently are all Japanese... the rest of us got obliterated, I suppose) convert the World War II battleship Yamato (the one the U.S. forces sunk in 1945) into a space cruiser. They use the new technology to beef up the weapons and include a super-cannon in the nose of the battleship that they call the "wave-motion" gun. It's essentially an unstoppable death ray that causes a horrible drain on the ship's energy supply.

So the Yamato takes off and experiments with this faster-than-light drive to try to get to this alien world and secure a magic technology that will restore the Earth.

The crew includes:

* Captain Okita, a grizzled veteran of past battles with the hostile aliens
* Susumu Kodai, the young, dashing, hero. He's an ace pilot, brash leader, etc. etc.
* Yuki Mori, the love interest for Kodai.

And there's others, but really they're all subordinate roles.

In the American release of the anime, all these characters had "Americanized" names but that's really not relevant here.

So the film starts with space battles. There's the obligatory obtaining the message/technology from the distant world (called "Iskandar") then getting the crew together and blasting off in the Yamato to fight through the aliens.

There's the introduction of the characters. There's character drama. There's more battles. There's... um... more character drama. There's a romance in there. There's lots of alien battles.

There's a shitload of people getting blasted.

There's a lot of explosions. Y'know, 'cause of the battles.

I'm not going to spoil with details. None of this is shocking if you know anything about the series at all.

The film does not follow the anime precisely. There's a LOT of corny, cliche-ridden junk in this.

And it works. Oh, does it work.

This is not Shakespeare and it's not meant to be. This is a space opera in the grand fashion of space operas. It's not supposed to have great acting. It's supposed to have over-acting stuff where men are manly men, aliens are aliens, and spaceships are spaceships (and all that stuff).

It's cheesy. Oh god is it cheesy. It is soaked in cheese then sprinkled with nacho cheese for more cheesy flavor.

For all that, the film-makers actually succeed. It's not injected with any artificial gravitas or depth. It's a fun, ridiculous, over-the-top movie.

They should have released it in the U.S. in general release.

Monday, August 22, 2011

We're off to Outer Space

Space Battleship Yamato, the 2010 movie based on what Americans of my age once watched as "Star Blazers", back in the day.

It's out on DVD now.

I got my copy today. It's a Hong Kong version with English subtitles.

This movie is beyond awesome.

This. This right here. This kind of movie is the kind of adventure-science fiction we need these days. Great space battles. Cheesy heroes. Cliches up the exhaust tube.

Hollywood? You bunch of useless dorks! You need to watch this and make stuff like this!

People Suck

Some jackass stole the blade for my car's rear windshield wiper.

What kind of fucking piece of shit steals a windshield wiper blade?

I am inclined to break something important off of said thief should I ever discover the identity of said turd-filled meatsack.

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Soapboxing

Okay, for some reason that defies logic, 170 people from the U.S. actually read or have viewed this blog.

You lot! Pay attention for a moment.

Look at Demand Progress's information on the "PROTECT IP" act that may well have a very solid impact on your web browsing and interactions with your ISP.

It's my not-so-humble opinion that this sort of legislation is, at best, ill-considered.

Might not be a bad idea to let your Congresspeeps know they ought to oppose this.

Yes, I know the current Congress has the collective IQ of a radish. Contact 'em anyway. They might even listen...

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Credit Where Credit is Due

It's amazing the proliferation of credit-card tool thingies out these days.

Case in point:

The CardSharp utility knife
The Eon Extreme Flashlight
The Carzor

There's other credit-card shaped things out there or tools to re-utilize credit cards.

I can't speak to many of such items, but the CardSharp, Eon Extreme, and Carzor are all items I couldn't resist acquiring.

The CardSharp is the first of the lot I went for. I've mentioned it in prior posts. It's still a neat little construct. Sharp little thing too. The one issue is that I have to remember to take it out of my wallet when I go to the airport or court or somesuch place where they're not keen on sharp objects in one's possession.

The Eon Extreme was the second of the lot that I obtained. I've similarly mentioned it. A few months have passed and my opinion of the Eon Extreme has changed a bit. The concept is really solid and the light is really damn bright, but the construction is a bit shoddy in parts. The case is aluminum that's glued on. When I first got the Eon Extreme, I had some problems with the activation button sticking on its highest setting (and causing the light to heat up a great deal). I later had problems as the glue gave way on one edge, exposing the insides. I had to re-glue the errant edge and then, for added security, I wrapped that edge in black electrical tape. Recently (in the past week or two) the light has demonstrated another problem: when I click on the highest (230 lumens) setting, the light shows super-bright for about 2 to 3 seconds, then it flickers and shifts down to the lower setting. The lower setting remains unaffected.

A bit of an irritation, really. I've asked the company for insight on how this could be fixed, but have yet to receive a reply.

Finally, I received my Carzor late yesterday. It's a fascinating little construct. It breaks out into two pieces: a razor and a U-shaped scratch-resistant mirror. Embedded in the U-frame are two razor cartridges. A third cartridge comes separately in the package.

It's a neat idea. I haven't tried to insert the cartridges yet and shave. I reserve judgment until I've managed that, but in terms of design, it's a cool little doodad.

Buffy the Exorcist Sla... no wait...

The Bible-thumper brigade has upped it to the next level.

That's right: teenage girl exorcist squads.

On the plus side, they hate "Twilight". On the minus side, they also hate "Harry Potter".

I'm curious where they stand on "Buffy the Vampire Slayer".

Oh, and they're from Arizona, the state where you need papers if your skin is any shade of brown. I know you find that shocking.

Apparently these girls find time for beauty pagents, horseback riding, and karate.

'Cause you may need to look good as you ride down the demon possessed and throw a roundhouse kick to the head in order to give Satan the boot. It's their way of saving the sole.

I could go on, but nobody wants that.

They're apparently getting a reality TV show. The article says the show is Canadian. I'm shocked FOX hasn't picked this idea up for local consumption.

(via io9)

Not a Simpson

Yeah, okay. BART protests.

So there was a much-ballyhooed and predicted BART protest yesterday. It shut down four stations in San Francisco.

For the uninformed, those stations were Embarcadero, Montgomery, Powell, and Civic Center. If you're going into San Francisco from the East Bay, those are the first four stations you'd arrive at. They're the main destinations for tourists, shoppers, etc.

Anyone who works downtown pretty much has to use those stations to get out of the city.

And BART's police shut them down around 5:30pm in response to disruptions caused by protesters.

Where to begin?

First of all, I'm puzzled at the behavior of the protesters. They're protesting the fatal shooting of a knife-wielding man on July 3.

I wasn't present for this, but by all accounts, a guy WITH A KNIFE threatened police (and apparently threw said knife at a BART cop).

I do believe there's a good argument for self-defense in the officer's reaction. I do not believe BART police carry TASERS at this point, but I may be wrong. I really don't pay that much attention to what BART cops are carrying.

Now, I get that people are sensitive about BART cops and gunplay. Oscar Grant was shot in the back by a BART police officer while Grant was face down on the ground. Again, I wasn't present for this, but it seems to me that the shooting was entirely unjustified in Grant's case. The officer who killed Grant certainly did not seem to get a stiff sentence for that shooting, but I am not aware of all the facts in the case.

And the shooting of the knife-wielding man is a very different scenario.

So the protesters are going apeshit and disrupting people's workdays after a long, tired Monday, to protest a cop shooting some guy who was threatening people on the BART platform with a knife.

I do not understand, or with the facts as they are now do I sympathize, with this protest. This is bullshit. Let the goddamn courts figure out if the cop was right to shoot a knife-wielding man or not.

Now... the flipside. BART almost had my sympathy over this protest situation. I don't particularly agree with their decision last week to shut down cellular and wireless service in the stations. It wouldn't affect me (my POS phone barely gets a signal in a BART station, for all their accessibility setup), but the principle of the matter is that BART acted very... ah... totalitarian.

So the protest happens anyway yesterday. It disrupts service on at least one platform. BART's reaction? Shut down four stations and keep people from entering said stations.

And that fixes the disruption of service...? There were hundreds of people essentially marooned in San Francisco for over two hours because BART wouldn't let people on to the platforms.

That's a solution to a protest? Really?

Seems to me that someone in charge of BART security is spending a little too much time taking tips from shows like "24". There had to be a better way to handle that situation.

Jesus... what a pooch-screw this has become.

Monday, August 15, 2011

Nukie Brown



The Lawyer



The Doctor



The Goon (my personal favorite)

Yes please

Daaaaamn....

You know BART's touched a nerve when the EFF says they've "pulled a Mubarak".

Can't say I personally disagree. I think most BART-related protests are counterproductive, but it's bad precedent to do stuff like kill cell phones just to disrupt a potential protest.

Oddly enough, I am in favor of killing cell phone signals in movie theaters, so I suppose one could argue I'm a bit of a hypocrite. I don't think the two situations are remotely the same, but in the interests of full disclosure... there it is.

Dr. Who!

There's a spoiler in this if you have not seen "A Good Man Goes to War". Otherwise, it's pretty spoiler-free.

A little prequel to the next new episode of "Dr. Who"...

Friday, August 12, 2011

Epic Synchronicity

In the latest blog post for Funranium Labs, Herr Direktor (the mad genius behind the Black Blood of the Earth - 100 ml of which is coursing through my veins as I type - and the Steins of Science - one of which is at my desk as I type...) mentions that he got to sit down and have multiple beers with Charles Stross.

Ponder a moment.

The awesomeness of Herr Direktor, scientist and pusher of hedonistic glory, and Charles Stross, the author of The Atrocity Archives (among many other science fiction classics) sitting down and having beers and talking about things scientific and whatever.

I would cheerfully have given an important organ (lung, kidney, heart, whatever) to witness such a meeting.

Oh, not one of my organs. I need them. Besides, my organs are crap. Nobody would want 'em.

Anyways, back to the awesome... I would have LOVED to witness such a meeting of awesome. I probably would have offered to buy all the beers.

I wouldn't have understood three words these two worthies would have uttered, mind you. I'm quite cognizant of my limitations. Still, it would have been fantastic to see two of my personal heroes having pints.

Good lord... I'm a fanboy.

I need a beer.

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Alternate Awesome

Sillof does customized action figures. Sillof's Workshop is most famous for their alternate "Star Wars" figures.

There's a series of new ones now that are just the purest awesome:

* Serial Wars (what if "Star Wars" had been a 1940's serial)

* Noir Wars (you know Humphrey Bogart would be a hell of a Yoda)

* Long Ago and Far Away (more traditional)

(via Nerd Approved)

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Punking with Steam

My friend V introduced me to the "steampunk" band, Abney Park yesterday. I decided to download their "Aether Shanties" album and give it a proper listening-to.

I still don't understand how "steampunk" became a music venue. The music itself is a kind of folk-ballad-rock hybrid in the manner of various "Celtic rock" bands like "Great Big Sea", "Clandestine", and such.

Apparently the performers dress up in "steampunk" garb on stage when they perform. The Wikipedia article claims they used to be a "goth" band. I'm still fuzzy on how "goth" is a music style, but whatever works.

Meh. Doesn't matter. I do like this "Aether Shanties" album. The titular "Aether Shanties" song is my favorite so far.

I feel like I need to be wearing goggles and a funky hat now.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Fiction Friction

As I impatiently wait for more of series six of "Dr. Who", I am trying to find other media to entertain and amuse me while I try desperately to avoid the depressing news of our nation's meltdown in utter stupidity.

I've been watching SyFy's new series "Alphas" (though I failed to record last night's episode). I think I've already described it as "X-Men lite" with bland acting and forgettable actors. So far my opinion hasn't changed. David Straithairn (playing the soft-spoken Dr. Lee Rosen) and Ryan Cartwright (playing the autistic Gary Bell) demonstrate the most compelling characters of the cast. Laura Mennell (playing the mind-controlling Nina Theroux) and Azita Ghanizada (playing the hyper-sensitive and neurotic Rachel Pirzad) are attractive actresses, but surprisingly boring. The two action heroes, Warren Christie (playing the super-coordinated, brooding Cameron Hicks) and Malik Yoba (playing the temperamental and super-strong Bill Harken) are easily the most one-dimensional and yawn-worthy of the lot.

It's really sad that "Alphas" is probably one of the best shows SyFy is currently airing. I've never really had the patience for the SyFy fluffy quasi-comedy shows like "Eureka" or "Warehouse 13". The 2000 "Invisible Man" show outclassed all of those in action/comedy the way a finely-tuned sports car outclasses a rusting used car.

Hm. Guess I've got opinions.

In desperation for other science fiction fare, I've tried to watch TNT's "Falling Skies". The "Hallmark Channel" style of heavy-handed moralistic claptrap is hard to handle in most of their plots. The stories are generally uninteresting and I often find myself hoping the aliens will swoop in and obliterate most of the cast save the delightfully sociopathic John Pope (played by Colin Cunningham), the out-of-her-depth Dr. Anne Glass (played by the beautiful Moon Bloodgood... I love her name), and the damaged Margaret (played by Sarah Carter).

I generally hate shows that have kids playing central roles anyway.

I have enjoyed the aliens in "Falling Skies". The bizarre mechs, the multi-limbed Skitters, and their gangly alien masters have all been entertaining. Their motivations and actions are generally stupid, but they look cool.

Honestly the show really does seem like it belongs on the "Hallmark Channel". It's hard to imagine how they could get more preachy about America's Revolutionary War history, Christianity, and the bonds of family.

Why the hell can't we get good, solid, adventure shows? "I-Man" was a great example of stories with clever writing, compelling characters, entertaining dialog, and good plots. Hell, "Battlestar Galactica" was outstanding in its first three seasons (despite my feeling that the pilot mini-series was a bit slow).

Bring back my "Dr. Who"! I needs me my sci-fi!

Monday, August 8, 2011

Blundstones

It's been a few days and I've had my Blundstones to break in.

I remain impressed.

I've read mixed reviews of Blundstone. Apparently their old, made-in-Australia boots were fantastic, but in recent years they've started having their manufacturing done in China and I guess the quality has slipped a bit.

I can't comment on that. I've only had these boots for a few days and I have no complaints. They've broken-in faster than most footwear I've obtained and are insanely-comfortable.

So much so that I've already ordered a second pair for hiking purposes (when my foot is healed enough that I can actually hike, that is).

I guess a lot of folks are also loving Redwing boots/shoes. If the Blundstones crap out, maybe I'll try those.

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Thundarr the Awesome

A few reasons why "Thundarr the Barbarian" is pure awesome:

* Giant robot monkeys

* "Ariel! Ookla! Ride!"

* "Release her, creature!"

* Vampire space ships

* "Lords of Light!"

* Conan the Barbarian ripoffs with lightsaber "sun swords"

* Wookie-like Moks

* A bathing-suit wearing "Princess" sorceress

Friday, August 5, 2011

Time Twisting

I've re-watched "series six" of the revived "Doctor Who". I just finished re-re-re-re-re-re-re-watching "A Good Man Goes to War", the mid-season finale.

And I'm finding the River Song story is bugging me.

Spoilers ahead for anyone who isn't up-to-date on "Doctor Who" so if you're not hip on your Who, move on to other things.

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Okay?

You were warned.

So River Song has stated repeatedly through her appearances that she's meeting the Doctor in the opposite direction that he's encountering her. The first time he met her was the last time she met him. Each time he learns more of her, she knows a bit less of him.

Their timelines are supposed to be going in different directions.

It's a clever and ambitious idea for a television program. It's got to be maddening to do.

And thus the continuity flaws.

So in "A Good Man Goes to War", you have Dorium Maldovar, the fat, blue, black-marketeer appear. Maldovar has had cameos in prior episodes, specifically in "The Pandorica Opens" in which he sells River a time-travel device.

Maldovar gets killed in "A Good Man Goes to War."

"The Pandorica Opens" happens earlier in the Doctor's time stream than "A Good Man Goes to War". Ergo, Maldovar should be dead in River's time stream and be unable to secure her the time travel device that lets her do her thing in that episode.

Unless the blue fat guy can regenerate (and I'm not ruling that out) it seems to me this River-Doctor time wonkiness is just going to get worse.

Argh.

Bugs me. I'm OCD enough for continuity. Time travel paradoxes really annoy me.

Okay, I got that off my chest.

End rant.

Good for the Sole

I'm a fan of Cory Doctorow's book "Little Brother". It's a paranoiac novel out of my paranoid little heart (or the blackened organ that serves the same purpose in my chest cavity).

I have a point. Bear with me.

So the hero of the book has a particular brand of footwear he favors: Blundstone boots.

In light of my recent injury, I decided I needed footwear that would be less of a problem for my damaged toe.

And since I'm totally a sucker for certain types of advertising... well, long story short, I got a pair from Zappo's.

I'm wearing them now. I know you care.

They're damn comfy. I expect I'll have more to say in the future.

Credit Card-tastic

I love stuff like this (the Carzor razor).

(via various places on the web like Gizmodo and Uncrate, among others)