Review: "The Man Ring" (titanium utility ring)

EDIT: Since posting this, I've re-read a couple of times and decided that this post needs edits. Marked with "EDIT" below:


I saw the Titanium Utility "Man" ring about a half hour after my tax refunds posted.

I'd like to say I debated the cost of the ring before ordering one.

I could still say that, but I'd be lying.

The turnaround for the ring was remarkably fast, all told. My reaction was "damn!" and that hasn't changed. And this is a "damn I regret nothing" kind of "damn!" reaction.

Perhaps I should have waited to write this review until I wasn't drinking beer.

Nah. That leads into this review, so moving on.

The ring is titanium. 6A15V Titanium (which, I assume, means something to metallurgists and the like). All I know is that it's freakin' gorgeous. It's got four brass rivets within and then there's the tools themselves.

EDIT (third pass): for ignorant folks like me, the ring comes with a certificate of authenticity that explains what "6A14V Titanium" is. In summary, it's used for airframes, jet engine and rocket components, and so on. Loosely-translated, it's badass metal.

The tools are tiny, magnificently-crafted little things. You really have to examine the ring carefully to even know they're there.

I assume they're made of titanium as well. There's five of 'em all snugly set in the ring itself. Two blades, a straight blade and one with a mild serrated edge, a saw, a bottle opener, and a comb.

First off, the comb is really only any good for combing something small, like a beard or moustache, I imagine. I don't have any use for it and I can't see quite how to make it work properly. I don't think the comb tool would open wide enough, but it's not something I plan on testing.

The blades are sharp little things. Very useful. I could see using these to open boxes or cut string and the like. They're not big enough to be weapons, which is fine by me. They're worth the cost of purchase right there.

The saw is also neat. It's essentially got more teeth than the mildly-serrated knife blade. I expect it could saw through small things (pencils and the like) nicely, should such a scenario ever emerge in the future.

The bottle opener was, I must admit, a mild-disappointment. About ten minutes before writing this post, I tried to use the bottle opener to open a bottle of Oaktown Brown. I couldn't quite get leverage and purchase enough to get the cap off the bottle.

I suppose if I were really determined it might work, but I was wary of damaging the ring itself or accidentally bending the tools, so I stopped and resorted to one of the six hundred or so other bottle openers I own.

EDIT (third pass): in all fairness, I could just be overly-timid using the bottle opener. It should work like a charm. I think I'm just afraid of scratching my shiny new ring or something. Guess I'll just have to do more testing!

So, bottom line. Is it worth nearly four hundred dollars?

Honestly? Even with my problems with the bottle opener, I regret nothing. That could come from the fact that I used a tax refund to buy it so the money never felt "real" to me.

The folks who make the ring have their own site: Boone Titanium rings. I found out they made a wedding ring for a buddy of mine and he absolutely loves them.

I found them a great seller to deal with and I have to tip my hat to their ingenuity and cleverness.

EDIT (second pass): In the interests of SCIENCE I just tried to open a Newcastle Brown Ale with the ring's bottle opener and just couldn't make it happen. Perhaps I'm doing it wrong? That would be both hysterical and weird given my experience with opening bottles.

EDIT (third pass): or my motor skills were iffy. Just sayin'...

Oh well. Still regret nothing.