Winding Down 2012

I've spent part of my last day of 2012 at the doctor's office to finally get them to check out my eye.

Nothing says "awesome" like hitting the doctor's office on New Year's Eve, let me tell you.

At least I've got meds.

I can already see the CHP is out in force today. Everyone's being a good little driver... or else.

My car keys are now safely tucked away. Not getting behind the wheel for the rest of today. I plan to hunker down, veg out, watch TV or play on the computer, and when the urge hits, drink some beer.

There's worse ways to end the year.

Farewell, 2012. You were a better year than 2011 by far.

Combating the Sloth

I've been a slug for seven days. I've eaten, drank, eaten, debauched, and essentially been a waste of human skin.

It's been delightful.

I even broke down and got myself a Zachary's Pizza under the theory that I'll behave myself in 2013 (no, I don't believe that lie either).

German rauchbier and Zachary's garlic and mushroom deep dish go well together. Just sayin'.

I've felt guilty, however. All I've done is watch my DVD set of the Cadfael Mysteries (look it up) since Xmas when I haven't been at a bar or what-not.

So to day I broke out the bike and went for a ride.

It's astounding, just astounding how out-of-shape I've become.

Astounding, not surprising. I guess there's little difference, so it wasn't all that astounding.

I rode a few miles along the shore, wussed-out, went home then forced my lazy arse out the door to go for a run. Didn't get terribly far for many reasons then came back home and made myself do a hundred push-ups and a hundred sit-ups.

Feeling good, I then had some Zachary's pizza and some beers. No sense getting any kind of net benefit out of this...

The 'D' is silent.

Saw Django Unchained.

In brief: see this movie only if you're a Tarantino fan. It's got all the basics you'd come to expect from Quintin Tarantino's films.

You know:

• Campy, over-the-top violence
• Campy, over-the-top acting
• More campy, over-the-top violence
• And it's too goddamn long by a good hour

Someone needs to explain to me what Australians were doing in Mississippi in this film.

Review: Doctor Who - The Snowmen

So I saw it. "The Snowmen" is the latest episode of "Doctor Who" and the latest Xmas Special.








Spoilers follow:




















Still there?



Okay...


So the Doctor is hanging out in Victorian London. Context is more helpful if you've seen several of the lead-in mini-eps that are about on the Internet. Helpful, but not necessary.

Creepy things are afoot. Ian McKellan's disembodied voice is using psychic snow to plot to take over the world.

And the Doctor, heartsbroken (see what I did there?) over the loss of Amy and Rory, doesn't give that much of a crap.

The Doctor is in some kind of weird partnership with Madam Vastra (the Silurian sword-wielding detective), Jenny (her human lover/wife and ninja-maid), and Strax (the miraculously-revived Sontaran psychotic nurse turned comic-relief butler) where they act as front people for him and he... offers nothing, as far as I could tell.

Enter Clara. Clara is a barmaid and a nanny. She's sharp. She's sassy. She's a cutie. She gets the Doctor involved in the appearance of strange snowmen who like to eat people.

Clara follows the Doctor to his fairytale-like life living in the TARDIS on a cloud at the top of a crazy-tall stairwell.

Why? Don't ask these questions.

Clara gets the Doctor involved and shenanigans occur. For details, watch the episode. The story was entertaining, but had a few weird bumps that come of Moffatt trying to do too much in too short a time.

The real story was establishing Jenna Louise Coleman's character as the Doctor's new companion.

A little bump in that road, as she dies in the episode. Oh, and she's the same character (kind of?) as the character of Oswin from "The Asylum of the Daleks". So... yeah. Weird mystery.

So the Doctor is off to find his new girlfriend... um... yeah. Okay, did I mention all the kissing?

Don't get me wrong, Coleman is hot, funny, and charming but the Doctor is not supposed to get that touchy-feely with humans. Even his "marriage" to River Song was very oddly cold as he treated River like shit as they exchanged vows.

Oh wait. Isn't the Doctor married now? WTF?

Whatever. It was a fun episode. I'll even call it a good one but still has flaws.

EDIT:

Pros:

• Clara's engaging personality and hustling
• Vastra, Jenny, and Strax
• The new TARDIS interior
• Ian McKellan's cameo
• The fairytale feel

Cons:

• The excessive clownishness of Strax
• Hitting everyone over the head with the gay marriage thing. We get it. Stop being so hamfisted, Moff!
• The Clara-Oswin mystery. I can already tell this is going to be annoyingly complex and stupid.
• Falling to the ground. Was that really necessary? Really?
• The human family. They were such a poorly-executed afterthought.
• The snowmen. Just... really?

On the Fence:

• The invisible ladder, long stairwell, and cloud for the TARDIS.
• The memory worm.
• The unexplained high-tech gadgets.

Happy Pastamas!

May the blessings of the Flying Spaghetti Monster be with you and you be touched by His Noodly Appendage.

In a good way. Unless you're one of those people who really likes bad touches.

I've got BBotE in my blood and will soon join family units in family stuff.

The only downside to life is the damn eye problem I have making me incapable of wearing contact lenses. Gah. Oh well. No need to dwell on the little things.

Oh, and for those of you celebrating Pagan stuff, joyous Yuletide and belated Happy Winter Solstice.

And Merry Xmas to those into that sort of thing. I made it 'till the 22nd before I got hit with "The Little Drummer Boy". So close...

Welcome Horror

22 December 2012

Craving sustenance and a pint of something to fortify the blood against the nameless horrors of the season, I stepped out to the local pub for a pint or two and a bite.

Upon returning to my abode, I found a strange box by my front door. Curious, I took the parcel within as I returned via my unlit hallway. I felt quite inquisitive as to how the parcel arrived on my doorstep. Did the locked doors of my building fail to stop the normal street traffic?

I set my various belongings aside, cast my umbrella to its place in my coat-rack, and opened the parcel.


From within compact packing materials, this sinister countenance was buried. It stares forth at me with a baleful presence demanding sacrifices of rum and juices mixed together in a proper manner so as to satisfy a dark and endless thirst that sets a mortal mind to a gibbering madness.

I set this strange idol aside as I investigated the parcel further. I am not certain where the strange appendage that emerges from the vessel came, but I choose not to acknowledge such for fear of my own sanity.

More was discovered within:


Memory tickles at the mind. It barely overcomes a near-mindless thirst that is all-consuming.

I fear there is more from whence this eldritch vessel came.

Perhaps the Mayans were not so incorrect as we were led to believe...

Yes. Exactly like this.

(Found on RPG.net

So....

Looks like the world is still here.

As far as I can tell, Australia, Japan, China, all those folks on that end of the International Dateline are still here.

So the lesson here is not to let folks on the same wavelength as Harold Camping twist stuff into hysteria, eh?

Unless you find that stuff amusing. If that's the case, carry on!

Tick-tock goes the nutter clock

According to the frothing masses of the Internet, tomorrow is the doomsday of the Mayan calendar running out of time-units or somesuch crazy.

Are you ready for zombies/aliens/earthquakes/Rapture/lizard people/comets/asteroids/chainsaw-wielding monkeys/Cthulhu?

I really wish I'd gotten that Apokatana.

I'm regretting not being more proactive over the pending apocalypse and hedging my bets a bit. Would have been nice to learn from those folks who thought the Rapture was upon us not too long ago and offer to take material possessions off of the hands of folks expecting Mayan snake gods to snack on us before the weekend.

With all the NRA folks buying up guns out of fear of talks of (likely never-to-happen) gun control in the States, I suppose it's too late to stockpile and build a bunker.

I'd have to learn to shoot. Probably too late for that too.

I'm not worried. I've been touched by His Noodley Appendage and look forward to an afterlife of beer volcanoes and strippers.

A few random Wednesday Thoughts

Per the fascinating statistics function, I have 59 pageviews from Russia. This week, apparently.

I'm truly curious as to what I post that would interest anyone in Russia.

Maybe there's just an interest in black-clad extraterrestrial simians?

---

The holidaze time-crunch is pressing against my consciousness. I'm starting to freak out on how in the hell I'm going to get the rest of my Xmas shopping done amidst various social obligations.

Strike that. I was stressing. Then I glanced through the news. Now I'm just goddamn thrilled I haven't had to deal with the sort of stuff that's currently getting media attention. Crazy fucking world.

---

In an effort to deal with repetitive stress issues during computer-use, I decided to stop sitting on an exercise ball as a computer chair and actually invest in a real chair.

In true "me-fashion", the obtaining of said chair would have made for a great sitcom episode. Random street guy hitting me up to sell me something sketchy. Problems finding what I needed. Traffic craziness. Skinning a knuckle carrying the boxed chair to my apartment. Assembly issues... you'd think a writer could spend a little more time reading the assembly instructions.

So far, it's worth it, I suppose. Cutting back on my computer use might be a better option, but let's not get crazy here.

---

It's funny what Bay Area natives consider "cold as hell". Anything less than 50 F (that's 10 C for you non-Americans) or more than 80 F (26 C for you non-Americans) and most of us freak out.

Depends on internal thermostat, of course. I have many friends who are always cold and want some Arizona-esque baking heat all the time. Crazy nutjobs.

Then there's others (like me) that enjoy the cool fog and prefer things on the chill side.

All the same, it's funny when the thermostat drops to the 40's or lower. You'd think the endtimes were coming the way the news warns us to bundle up and worry about things like black ice, frost on windows, and what-not.

If we got actual snow here, we'd be paralyzed.

So now I sit at my desk with my hood up like a Nazgul (mostly to filter out hated fluorescent lighting) and feel a weird mix of enjoying the chilly weather while simultaneously whining about it.

Life doesn't suck.

I expect it would be much colder in Russia.

Arguments for a varied wardrobe

I like wearing dark colors. I favor black, dark blue, dark green, and various shades of grey.

I have my reasons. They vary from "it doesn't show the coffee I just spilled on my shirt all that easily" to "Mom wouldn't let me wear this when I was a kid" to "I think this makes me look like a badass if I super-charge my imagination" to whatever.

In winter-ish time, most folks wear variations of a black or dark grey coat, sweaters, dark pants, etc.

And headwear.

So I get dressed this morning. It's cold.

Being the delicate little creature I am, I layer. Wool hoodie over a shirt. Leather jacket over that. Black thug cap to protect the delicate scalp from the chilly morning air.

I paused and glanced in the mirror. I looked like a cartoon hoodlum for a bad TV show. You know the sort. The kind of character whom the good guy shoots/beats senseless/whatever in an orgy of ridiculous violence at any given point in the story.

"Cool", I thought.

I headed out.

And drove right through a surprisingly-extensive police action.

I have no idea what the hell was going on. There was police tape being taken down. There were cops all over the place.

And it's early in the morning.

Without a second's thought, that tiny voice in the back of my head drowned out all the others (I really should stop joking about voices in the head) and reminded me that I look like a cartoon thug. And it's dark out. And clearly something went down. And I'd rather not be late to work for looking like someone the police want to chat with (even if I've done nothing wrong).

Paranoia, you are a strange mistress.

Yanked the cap off my head. Drove polite as my dear departed grandmother would.

The cops, of course, didn't worry about me. I'm driving a car that looks harmless. I'm clearly some dork who works too goddamn early.

Joy and Chaos

Got a refill of Black Blood of the Earth. Tremble before the POWER of the Dark Side!

Seriously. I've been jonesing for it.

---

This is easily the most disorganized I've ever been for Xmas. I'm at a complete loss as to how to deal with certain Xmas gift obligations.

Why is this time so goddamn frustrating?

---

Stress, stress, stress. Work stress. Holiday stress. Health stress. No wonder people drink like fish this time of year.

Yes, I'm justifying the booze. Don't judge me.

---

Soon the Doctor Who Xmas special will arrive and we Whovians get our fix. Sooooon...

The Tainto

As I previously indicated I received my order from Zombie Tools over the weekend.

The Tainto.

Modeled on the Japanese Tanto, the Tainto is fourteen inches (35 cm) of hefty goddamn steel with a six-inch handle wrapped in black leather and an eight inch, single-edged blade of distressed-looking steel that oozes badass.

To say I was giddy this weekend does not quite cover the joy I felt.

It's a solid knife and in my many years of blade-collecting, probably the highest-quality piece I've obtained (with the possible exception of some smithing work done by a buddy of mine).

It's got great balance and a nice feel to it. The edge could be a bit sharper, but some work on the whetting stone should fix that up nicely.

I now need to save up for an Apokatana and a matching Zakasushi. Want. So. Badly.

One day...

Lovecraftian Holiday Songs

Ia Ia Solstice F'tagn.

It Has Arrived!

Review: The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

Saw The Hobbit last night in 3D with the new higher frame-rate.

Thoughts (I'm not sure if these are spoilers, so be warned anyway):





























It was a beautiful film, just as the Lord of the Rings films were. Martin Freeman is an excellent Bilbo Baggins. I personally loved seeing Sylvester McCoy as Radagast the Brown (even though HE DOESN'T APPEAR IN THE DAMN BOOK!!!!).

Those were the best parts.

The story was vaguely true to the original in an "inspired by" sense. The Dwarves... well, I guess they were fine in their own way.

Mostly they didn't look very "Dwarfish" to me, but I guess that's a personal thing.

The story plodded along. That's mostly because a small book is getting broken into three ridiculously-long films and getting padded with a lot of unnecessary stuff.

The frame-rate made everything look kind of off and wrong. Most people I talked to said you don't notice after the first half-hour. Personally I found the effect really hit me towards the later half of the movie. The later parts seemed jarring and really took me out of the experience.

Personally I wouldn't recommend seeing it in 3D or at the higher frame rate. It's not worth it.

Overall, I give the film a solid 'C'. Adequate as an adventure film but not great. Nowhere near as enjoyable as the Lord of the Rings films. Not even by a little.

Ten Hours of Awesome

You're welcome.

A Smattering of This-and-That

The holidaze are upon us. Ah, Xmas shopping.

*sigh*

---

My dad gave me a bottle of Alaska Brewery's smoked beer over the weekend. I cracked it open for... um... with... dinner last night.

Tasty stuff!

Could have stood to be a bit more smokey and it's not as bacon-y as Bavarian rauchbier, but I enjoyed it all the same.

The right side, too. Big ol' bottle. Left me in a nice mood.

---

Somewhere along the way, I got the DVDs for the "Dark Angel" TV series.

No sense being coy about it. Jessica Alba was totally the main draw.

Despite the cheesy acting, dubious plot, and annoying subplots, I truly enjoy this show.

I find it eerie how they predicted drones being used as law enforcement tools.

We need a leather-clad Jessica Alba to save us!

---

I'm regretting reading "Cold Nights" so quickly. Now nothing else really draws my attention.

---

Reviews of The Hobbit are buzzing about the Internet. I haven't read any in great detail, mostly so I can be surprised when I see the film on Friday.

I've heard more than a few reports that The Hobbit: There and Back Again (that's the name of the first film?) is a bit slow and plodding.

Can't say I'd be surprised to find that to be true. I really don't know what they were thinking making this into three films.

The novel "The Hobbit" is a tiny thing when compared to even the appendices of "Return of the King" (which are a bit more than 1/3 of the book, if memory serves). There's just not a lot of story there when compared with the trilogy.

I get that Jackson hopes to pad the story by going into what happened "off camera" using Tolkien's notes, but I find myself wary of how that's going to play out.

Oh well. I'm over-thinking it. Martin Freeman will rock as Bilbo Baggins. The rest should be entertaining.

Wee bit brisk

Yesterday morning was odd. I left my apartment and it was sufficiently warm that a light jacket was all I needed.

Then suddenly, some storm has started its southerly journey and sent a bit of the cold air our way.

This morning was a very different story.

Feels more like December now.

'Bout damn time. I get nervous when December is warm.

Don't get me wrong. I don't mind being able to go about in a t-shirt all day in December, but there's something intrinsically wrong with that.

One Ring to... no wait. Two Rings to... no....

How does this work, anyway? If you wear one of the One Ring earrings, do you half-disappear? If you put on both do you doubly disappear?

If one person wears one One Ring earring and another wears the other, does that mean there's some kind of power struggle in Mordor?

These are the sorts of thoughts that go through my head when I see nerd props. I need a vacation.

Review: Cold Nights

I got Jim Butcher's Cold Nights on Wednesday. It sat unread as I finished Red Country and handed that off to friends to read.

Thursday night I started the 515 page beast. I was feeling a little iffy so I crashed out early, promising myself that I was going to pace reading this book.

Yesterday, after work, I took it to the local bar and read for a few hours.

Tipsy, I went home and continued to read. Late.

Today, I read, took a few breaks, read some more, then about five minutes ago, I finished it.



Damn.

The latest in the Dresden Files series has Harry Dresden returning to the story after the crazy events in Ghost Story (which, I have to say, was not my favorite of the series).

Without spoiling things too much, the story has Harry paying for a bargain he made a couple of books back. A bargain with the Fae.

The story is, like many of the Dresden Files stories, a series of crazy events culminating in some pretty epic insanity.

Butcher does this well. I'm inclined to think he's one of the better authors for building up a story and giving a satisfying conflict with a satisfying resolution.

Cold Nights isn't like most of the previous books. There's a greater intensity to the narrative in this one. The stakes stay pretty crazy from the get-go and keep going higher into nutsville.

I vaguely recall somewhere that Butcher intends to make the Dresden Files a 20-novel series. I will be curious to see him carry that out.

And I intend to read every damn one.

MAD... you know, I'm not even going to try it this time

Watched my recording of Wednesday's "Arrow". They've added the DC character of the Huntress to the mix.

The acting remains a steady level of fairly awful. The dialog is actually physically-painful to listen to. The action doesn't suck, but there could be more of it.

And yet I can't stop watching. Am I craving superhero shows that badly?

---

Finished "Red Country" last night. Ye gods what a fucked-up book. Love Abercrombie's grim and crazy world, but I'm ready for something lighter.

Hello "Cold Days". A little Dresden Files action is what I need.

---

I really do need a book to dominate my time for a while. Having a few ugly moments with whatever repetitive stress is manifesting in my elbow. Using a mouse is an unpleasant experience, even with the neat ergonomic ones I now use at both work and home.

Need something to get away from the computer for a time.

---

Pear Harbor Remembrance Day today. A time when we U.S. folks recall how Hawai'i got introduced to WWII.

I had family in Honolulu during those days and, as a child, often heard stories of the bombing and how some of my family had to race another family member to the base. Made for exciting stories, but I never really understood it. Not properly.

Then, back in 2001, my grandmother insisted I take her to see Pearl Harbor.

She was present for the bombings and often mentioned that day in stories that I rarely gave much credit.

Pearl Harbor is a terrible movie, even with the delicious Kate Beckinsale in it. That said, the scene of the actual attack is pretty intense. And it freaked my grandma out. Actually brought tears to her eyes.

After that, I think I understood what it must have been like. Just a little, tiny, bit.

Makes me grateful I've never had to go through that kind of insanity in my life.

Interestingly enough, a few months later, 9/11 happened.

Thankfully, I was here in California, blissfully unaffected by the crazier stuff that was going on. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't thinking of that damn movie and my grandmother's reaction a couple of times while the news was showing the Two Towers going down.

Crazy goddman world.

Lust List and Stuff

I have, at best, only a few isolated scenarios in which a slingshot is of any practical use in my life.

That does not stop me from wanting this with an unholy desire.

If I can make it work in my budget in 2013, I actually want to look into archery. That's not going to be an inexpensive hobby, alas.

Oh, I could rent a bow and all that. My friend V has shared her experiences with her archery options in the area. The thought has appeal but if I go into this hobby, I'll probably want to get a bow.

I never realized it before, but archery and using slingshots seem to have a fair amount in common.

---

I used to wear a 686 Tool belt as my belt of choice.

I always liked the idea of having screwdrivers at-hand (so to speak) and a bottle-opener to boot (though opening a bottle with the belt buckle can look really awkward... okay, moving on...).

I tried an Instructable method for converting my tool belt into a makeshift money belt at one point by adding velcro on this inside.

It worked okay for a time, but there were... flaws. To do this right, I'd really need to do some sewing, a skill I lack. And to it the way I wanted, I'd have to be able to stitch into the leather of the belt, which I simply don't have the right tools to do properly.

Long story short, I opted to get a different belt.

I got the travel belt on Preparedness Deals. It looks nicely-unobtrusive and has that hidden pocket option that I so love.

Nice belt. Lighter and easier to adjust. This may well be my new favorite for a while.

MADNESS? This is... no wait, I did this already.

So endeth the rain to the Bay Area for a while. I expect the break is welcome to folks repairing damage and clearing drains, but I hope it's a wet winter with lots of snow in the Sierras.

We need it.

---

Erik tipped me off to Trader Joe's cinnamon rolls last time I had an in-person chat with him.

I got some last week. Made some last weekend. Results:

• Delicious beyond words
• The damn things are about 390 calories a pop.
• Delicious beyond words
• The sugar messed me up.

Conclusion: if I ever want to develop full-blow diabetes, these things are the way to go.

---

So yesterday was Repeal Day, when Prohibition was tossed out as a bad idea. Arguably one of the saner moments in our nation's history.

Not-too-coincidentally, Washington (state) has legalized marijuana.

I'm not a massive fan of MJ myself. I don't like the act of smoking and eating anything with weed in it has too long of an effect.
I prefer my booze as I know how long that's going to alter my state.

That said, I'm all for legalizing it. Marijuana is pretty low-key as drugs go. I've known tons of mean drunks but have yet to meet a mean stoner ("mean" defined as someone willing to be violent rather than someone not willing to share a bag of chips or some pizza).

---

I'd like the weather to get a bit cooler, personally. I don't mind the mild temperatures, for the most part, but I do enjoy a nice, crisp, cold morning from time-to-time, especially when the season calls for it.

Thank the FSM our "cold" in the Bay Area is just "somewhat chilly" by the standards of the rest of the world. We don't (normally) get snow or any of that crazy stuff.

Madness? THIS. IS. WEDNESDAY!

It's raining. Love it. I guess this is the last of the wet stuff for a while. Hope we get more. A lot more. And I hope it's spaced out with dry periods so we don't have flooding.

And I want a pony that craps gold.

---

A friend of mine asked me to look over a paper for her class. It's math. It's not just math. It's math that may as well be a completely foreign language to me. I can't remember the last time I had to look at math problems that involved graphs, roots, and letters-in-place-of-numbers.

I'm having PTSD flashbacks from high school math class. Well, I would if I could remember high school.

---

Twenty more days 'till Xmas. I've been lucky. Thus far I've not heard a single bit of Xmas music. The only Xmas bling I've been subjected to are the office Xmas trees. Good times there.

---

Reading Red Country by Ian Abercrombie. If you're not familiar with Abercrombie's work, he writes happy, fluffy, light-hearted fictional accounts of fantasy settings.

By which I mean the settings are fantasy but anything other than happy, fluffy, and light-hearted.

I'm liking the book, but I'm thinking Abercrombie really intended for this to be a western instead of a more swords-and-knives fantasy. There's been a few showdown scenes that were a bit jarring for having characters with hands on knives instead of six-shooters.

Otherwise it's not a happy story in the least. Still enjoying it.

---

Waiting on my order of Jim Butcher's next Dresden Files book. Should come today if all goes well.

Compared to Abercrombie, Butcher writes of a magical world where flying unicorns crap rainbows and sing of friendship and love.

And Butcher does not write of these things.

---

I have participated in several Kickstarters now. I'm running about 50-50 on getting any kind of substantive return on my investments, but that's due to delays in production rather than tossing money into a black hole.

I have high hopes that I shall have my Cthulhu Tiki Mug by end of January (if the Elder Gods are kind... you may laugh at that....) and maybe see a few other things float into production and reality.

I can't wait to have a Zombie in my Cthulhu Tiki Mug... should this product actually come my way.

I have to say, Kickstarter was a brilliant idea.