The Fairer Sex and Gravity Lessons

Anyone who looks upon women as delicate and frail flowers in need of protection should really take a month or so of martial arts classes.

Doesn't matter what kind.

Case in point: a demonstration in throws. (Individual experiences may vary)

Big strong guy stands, vaguely smug in the knowledge that he outweighs the lady by a good... oh... sixty or seventy pounds.

The young lady grabs the arm and the lapel. There's pulling motion. The guy is on his toes. As this is happening, the lady spins and closes the gap. Her shoulder is pretty much set right into his. Her hip is just below his belt (keep the thoughts clean here). Her knees are bent. He's still off-balance and moving forward. She's straightening her legs.

He's thinking "Oh hey, I'm going forward."

She's twisting and pulling.

He's thinking "Oh hey, I can fly. F*ck you, gravity!"

Gravity responds.

He meets the floor. The parts of his body that connect with the mat no longer send signals to his brain that they exist. That's gonna last a second or two, then the nerve endings are going to transmit those pain signals.

He's thinking "How did I get here? Oh hey, she's got my arm. That's nice. It lessened the fall a bit. Wait? I fell? What's she doing with my arrrrGGGGGGGHHHH!!!!!"

His arm, now at a somewhat unnatural angle, is transmitting pain signals that are drowning out the pain signals from the parts of his body that have been rudely introduced to the ground.

He's got a couple of choices at this juncture. He can:

A) Scream like a baby.

B) Tap the mat with a free limb that still works.

He goes with 'B'.

There's time for him to try to return the favor to her. It's not as graceful nor are his moves as effective. Overall it works, but it's clear who is better at this.

Lesson learned.