Signs of Old Age

• You thank the liquor store clerk for carding you.
• You get "Senior Singles" spam.
• You feel weather in your joints. For real.
• You look at some modern trends and think "what the fucking hell?".
• You stop getting shocked by seeing grey in your hair.
• You can't eat the crap you used to eat.
• You can't drink the swill you used to drink.
• You remember commercial jingles for products that are sold as "vintage" in specialty sites on the Internet.